Geek's Guide
A bit of free LONELY time.
 

 

This is the REAL world, and you want to get yourself a real woman. So how do you start?

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    imageYou, unfortunately, are a geek. There, it's been said. You're away from your geeky fun for the moment, whether it be a Warcraft raid or a Star Trek marathon, and you have some free time.

    A bit of free LONELY time.

    You decide you want to get a little female companionship in your life. But it's not like those medieval L.A.R.P fairs you go to where you can knock a damsel over the head and drag her back to your tent.

    This is the REAL world, and you want to get yourself a real woman. So how do you start?

    Step #1: Clean yourself up

    Geeks typically aren't the most fashion conscious types. Most of them are happy wearing their various assortments of t-shirts, jeans, and flip-flops.

    But we're talking about attracting women here, and like it or not, ya gotta try and look your best. Now, you don't have to look like a full-on club-goer, but we gotta clean ya up a bit.

    Get a nice haircut, shave, wear contact lenses if you need to, don some shirts you DIDN'T have in high school (you know, the ones without any band names or superheroes on them), and ditch the jean shorts buddy!

    Hey, just because you look like a cast member from Revenge Of The Nerds, doesn't mean you need to continue to do so. A person's looks reflect how they feel about themselves. So try to look like you care. Take some time with this.

    Looking like a well groomed adult is going to help with this, immensely.

    Step #2. Brush up on pop culture

    Like it or not, you're going to have to familiarize yourself with the current goings-on of all things Hollywood. TV shows, celebrity gossip, hot new bands - the works!

    Why? Because you're going to need something you can talk to girls about, and EVERY girl is into pop culture.

    A word of warning here - Star Trek, Star Wars, or anything with the word "Star" in it is NOT part of pop culture. At least not the kind women like. Take all that geek knowledge you've accumulated and set it aside for now. You're going to be slumming it for a while.

    First off, start watching VH1. A lot. Catch up on the reality shows on that channel. Studies show 89% of available women watch Reality TV, and VH1 is the king of that kind of programming.

    Listen to the radio and go on iTunes. This'll help you check out the latest popular music. If you're feeling really saucy, turn on MTV.

    Silly as it sounds, it'll pay off in droves later.

    Step #3. Step back from the game controller

    Being a geek and loving video games pretty much goes hand-in-hand. And video games are awesome, so they're nothing to be ashamed of.

    However, some geeks use video games as a way to replace a non-existent social life. They get their "human contact" fix by chatting with their guild mates in Everquest, or those lame n00bs on Xbox Live, and don't feel the need to go out and meet real people.

    Well, put that X-Box controller down and unplug your PS3. If you want to meet women, you're going to have to take some time off from the video games.

    As an avid gamer myself, I know how they can rule your life if you let them. Before you know it, it's three in the morning and you're trying to kill one more boss and get one more power up so you can increase your gamer score.

    However, all this time spent on video games keeps you away from the girls! If you resolve to take a slight break from your game play time, you'll find that you will have much more time to meet and hang out with women.

    Now, I'm not telling you to give up video games all together - that's crazy talk! But make meeting women a priority over the next Zelda game... just for a little while.

    Step #4. Get out of the house

    Geeks have a really bad habit of staying indoors - sometimes with other geeks, but most of the time by themselves.

    Let me be clear - you will NEVER meet women unless you get out in the "real world." (And no, internet porn does not count as meeting women.)

    Take some time after work and go hang out somewhere for an hour. It can be someplace you enjoy, like a bookstore, a coffee shop, a dog park - wherever.

    Just remember... go somewhere there are actually GIRLS!

    Going to Game stop and blabbing it up with the male clerk there isn't getting out of your house either.

    How about this: go somewhere where shopping happens, but try a place that women might actually shop in. There are plenty, as they love to do it. That way, you can interact with them.

    Another important thing - don't bring your laptop or iPod with you! Bad, bad, bad. Those are distractions. Sitting in a coffee shop playing World Of Warcraft on your laptop will do you little good. Not having any distractions will force you to focus on the task at hand, which is meeting some chicks!

    Step #5. Meet some girls

    Now that you've made it out of the house, you gotta start talking to some women.

    Try and keep these meetings light. Don't try and get a date off the bat. Just start random chit-chat with girls. If they seem cool, then (and only then) ask for her number.

    Try and set up dates to meet with the girl. Get together for coffee or drinks. Do fun stuff that the both of you enjoy doing. Don't start revealing your geekiness until at least the third date, after she's built up some comfort around you.

    Use the internet to your advantage. Sign up for a few dating sites. This will also help you keep your date calendar full.

    But most importantly - HAVE FUN!

    Meeting women can be just as fun as any video game you've ever played. You just have to know the right way to do it.

    And hey, don't try to hard to change yourself. You are cool the way you are, and in time the women will come around to recognize this.

    Do remember, she'll have to get used to the idea. You are going to have to be subtle, or it's possible that you'll scare her off. Ease her into it and she might be fragging you in Quake sometime soon!!

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